Sunday morning thoughts... It’s been a emotional last few days and I find myself tearing up over and over just thinking about a friend’s premature death. My friend had so much to live for, and she really, really wanted to live. And I don’t understand this wholly, but I’m simultaneously feeling strangely guilty that I’m … Continue reading Drink the Lovely Coffee
Metastatic Breast Cancer
The Physician God Complex
It’s a very complicated relationship I have with this man; I am simultaneously grateful to him and seriously angry with him. And I am scared to leave him.
Comes the Peace
Every. Single. Day. I fail, sometimes spectacularly in some aspects; and yet I am STILL HERE on this planet for the reasons only He knows, to give, to surrender more and more - my health, my relationships, my career, all my plans, my goals, my entire life… everything I have. And only after I do that, comes the Peace.
Disco Kroger
Monday… Exhausted and cranky. This morning I had my 24th radiation session; it comes with a painful and itchy rash, and the entire area is swollen and hot to the touch - has been for about a week. Some areas are weeping where blisters have opened. Joint and bone ache, hips and knees are a … Continue reading Disco Kroger
Those Hibernating Bears
My bilateral mastectomy surgery went well according to the surgeon. There are few complications except for the large, hard and uncomfortable remaining hematomas, and this annoying stupid drain that still bleeds red after five weeks. My post-surgery pathology report revealed three, small tumors containing a small percent of cancer cells that didn’t light up in my January 2019 PET.
Why Cancer Sucks Up All My Time (or what I did so far today)
6:30 am - I wake up in a serious panic because in just 12 more days I will be having both of my breasts surgically removed. Simultaneously I rehash in my mind the fact that, as late as yesterday afternoon, my surgeon’s office had yet to schedule my pending double mastectomy, port removal and sentinel node injection with visual” with the other hospital.
Life In Introspection 